How to Get That One Special Girl – Part 3 – Making the Move on the Girl Without Breaking Your Friend

It’s a difficult problem we all seem to get in; you start feeling for your best friend, or girls close to you who you get along with so well. The problem is, what if they don’t like you back? Fear no longer, for there is a way to determine if she likes you, figure out a way to ask her out if she does like you, and hopefully live happily ever after.

As a start the most important element is to ensure that this girl really IS interested in you in return. This is unfortunately the part where even I myself go wrong, in that you assume because she is fun, flirty and loves to talk to you, that she has an interest in possible dating. The problem is sometimes girls are just like this with every guy, even when they are already happy in a relationship. This is generally because they merely love the attention and thrill of flirting with another guy, even if it will never lead anywhere. Not that girls in relationships are always happy, she may be on the lookout for a better guy, and luckily there is an incredibly simple way to check: Take a look at how she treats other guys. See how she treats her other guy friends, those in your workplace/school and so on. If she doesn’t treat you any different she probably doesn’t have an interest in dating you. That’s not to say she’ll never have an interest in you, just that you shouldn’t make any moves yet.

There are many different situations you may find yourself in, as there are many different types of girls and many different levels you know each other at. So I’ve decided to figure out a generic system which you can use to figure out how to approach in the best possible manner. This is simply coming from my experience with many different girls and unfortunately every situation is different, so take it as a rough guide but don’t live by it, use common sense too J, I’m really just generalizing here so find what best fits your situation and go from there.

There are 3 main categories for a girls social/outgoing level and because of this each type of girl should be treated with a different tact. While outgoing girls might like to go out drinking with you and friends, the shy girls may want something where they don’t need to interact with others so much.

Shy Girl

The shy quiet girls are girls who may only have other female friends and are almost never the center of attention, often spending a night at home or with their girl friends rather than going out drinking. One of the most common situations you will find yourself in with a girl is this one. Quite often it’s that cute girl who looks like she could be really sweet and nice, but you just haven’t gotten to know her, instead simply being an admirer from afar. The problem with this situation is that it’s really hard for it to go anywhere especially if you yourself are very shy. Although there are pluses, generally shy girls will still go out with you even if they don’t particularly like you (this is a good thing, for when you are out together you can bond and perhaps take it further) and usually if you break up afterwards it’s easy to go back to how you were before. Most of the ways of asking her out can feel a bit awkward because shy girls don’t give as much feedback and/or enthusiasm as others, ignore this feeling for its only going to hold you back.

One last thing that many guys fail to realize is that just because shy girls don’t talk much or seem so excitable, doesn’t mean they want something low energy like a stroll along the beach as a first date. Going out to a theme park works very well too, so long as they don’t need to meet random strangers to have fun (ie. Pubs/clubs are generally a bad idea).

Normal Girl

The Normal Girls are the middle of the road girls that are open and talk to everyone, girls and guys alike but won’t usually be the kind of girl all the guys’ desire. Normal girls are some of the most fun girls in the world once you get to know them, like the outgoing girls they generally have a very vivid, strong personality, but like shy girls they do tend to hide it from those they don’t know too well. The thing about this type of girl is that her attraction level to you can greatly vary, and it often has a lot to do with how much interest she gets from the other guys. Unlike shy girls and Outgoing girls, normal girls should be done more on a case per case basis rather than just using a general rule on how to approach and deal with the situation.

For a first date, pretty much anything goes. Clubs may be a bit overwhelming unless they love going out and just dancing, but on the whole generally they are up for anything fun.

Outgoing Girl

The Outgoing girls are generally either hot and as such get a lot of attention, or they are simply the fun, hyperactive girls who love life, being very flirty and out there. Loud Outgoing girls can be by far the most fun however they are also the ones most guys generally get confused by. The reason for this confusion is simply that outgoing fun girls are generally the kind of girls that love to party and are perfectly fine flirting with any guy just for fun (even if they have no interest in dating him). This is why it’s best for any outgoing girl you ensure she treats you differently to other guys, she may be a lot more flirty than the shy girl in the office but that doesn’t mean she likes you more than her.

For a first date the outgoing kind of girl generally likes something with a bit of social interaction, clubbing works well, as does just a general house party of your friends. The Outgoing girls are generally more high energy and like more excitement than most and as such a dinner date doesn’t go down too well (it’s sweet and all, but you will probably find yourself in the *friends zone* with her unless you combine dinner with something else exciting.)

One thing to keep in mind is that because Outgoing girls are by their nature, very outgoing, she will most likely chat to random strangers when out and about (clubs/parties and so on), getting jealous of it will only be detrimental, so you need to be able to let her go and socialize by herself without needing to be the only one talking to her all night long.

The Friendships

Then there are also 3 types of friendships with girls. You can be acquaintances, maybe you just know each other’s names and share small talk, but don’t really hang out at all or have much to do with each other. There are the semi-friends, maybe you’ve been at the same party once or twice, talk a fair bit, and are comfortable around them. Maybe they are even members of your small group of friends but you probably wouldn’t hang out with without inviting everyone out at once, you are probably fine talking to them at school/work but don’t take it much outside there. Then there are the best friends, the girls you can talk too easily, everyone can see you are great friends and you are perfectly fine hanging out with them by yourself or with only 3-4 people out (like at the movies or something).

As an Acquaintance

Liking a girl from afar and sharing very few moments together is honestly not where you want to be in your school/workplace

Getting to know her is sometimes hard especially if you are in completely different social circles as you can’t just walk up and talk to her, and it may be hard to get her alone to talk to. If you feel you can’t talk to her in front of your friends in all honesty you aren’t ready to be making a move on her. If she likes you back she will actually introduce you and chat with you fine around her friends, without being uncomfortable about it. This is a key I think many guys miss, they see a girl they like and try to sort of only chat with her when she’s alone, ignoring her when she’s in her group of friends. This is honestly one of the worst things you can do to get to know her, as not only can you come off as “the weird guy who keeps talking to me when alone”, but even if she does like you she won’t want to date you because her friends don’t approve (and to women, approval of their friends is a huge thing).

That doesn’t mean just give up if you aren’t in her circle of friends, all you really need to do is get to know one or two of her friends as well as her and the rest will take care of itself (seriously), in groups its funny that most people make up their own minds based on the opinions of others, so if 2 or 3 of the girls/guys in the group think you’re a fun, chill, normal person they will all accept you and become friends with you. Not only this, once you are in with her circle of friends her attraction towards you will increase greatly (as you are no longer another random guy but a friend of hers), and she will start to notice you and your best qualities more than ever before.

Oftentimes it’s hard to break into that social circle of her friends but all you really need is one or two friends of hers that you can talk to and everyone else will follow suit.

Shy

Honestly the best thing to do in this situation would be to first get to know this girl until you are at a level where you are both comfortable with each other before asking her out. If you aren’t able to strike up a conversation fine in the office/at school it’s going to be monumentally harder on your first date, so just take the time to get to know her and see if you really do like her personality. The great thing about this is that the shy girls are generally the easiest to talk to once you realize that them being quiet doesn’t mean they don’t want to talk to you, it’s simply how they are. Talking isn’t usually as hard because you aren’t fighting for their attention like the more outgoing girls and shy girls don’t generally get that much social interaction so are happy to talk to anybody that comes up and starts a conversation with them.

You can ask her out if you really desire and she will most likely accept out of politeness even if she isn’t all that interested. However this has the problem of if you are both shy people and don’t know each other very well, dating may be incredibly awkward, which is why it’s best to at least be semi friends with her and hang out with her in a group of friends first.

Normal / Outgoing

Normal and Outgoing girls as acquaintances can actually work very well, simply because these girls generally have shorter attention spans and are more high energy than most they will get over things quite quickly if you ask them out and it doesn’t work out. On the flip side, these girls generally have enough social skills to talk to anyone and as such probably have a handful of guys interested in them. This pretty much means it’s a much better idea to actually meet them and their friends first (as said above) before asking her out, although it can work without knowing each other well (if you can tell she’s interested), and if you read the signals wrong and she doesn’t really like you back she will generally get over it pretty quickly.

As a Semi-Friend

This is a great level to be at as you probably know this girl well enough to just chat, go out for drinks with a big group of friends and so on without it being awkward or uncomfortable. It’s probably the best place to be with any girl you have an interest in as not only do you not have the problem of not knowing her well enough to talk to her, but you aren’t stuck in that dreaded *friends only* zone many guys find themselves in when they fall in love with their best friend.

As a semi friend pretty much all girls are very similar in approach, simply flirt with her a bit and see if she does it back then find out if she treats you differently than other guys. After you think she likes you, invite her out with your group of friends for drinks or a fun night out and see what happens, if she shows a great deal of interest in you while out (generally it’s a lot easier to tell if she likes you when out rather than in the office/school as she will be a lot more relaxed) then you can ask her out.

As a Best Friend

Having a female friend as a best friend can be the greatest thing in the world for many guys and this is the core reason I believe you should stay away from dating your best friend. Simply because having a female best friend (or multiple great female friends) and just hanging out them will get you better at interacting and dating women than any book can possibly teach you. Having female friends pays off on many levels, from learning to be comfortable around women, to being able to get advice from them (here’s a tip: the worst advice in the world generally comes from a woman’s mouth, the best advice comes from watching how she reacts to guys and the kind of guys she dates, but more on that in a future email) and to meet your friends friends for potential dating (hell, often female friends will set you up on dates with their friends themselves). It’s because of all these reasons that I’d highly recommend not dating your best friends unless you are almost certain she would love to date you.

Dating the Best friend is one of the true romantic stories and often can work out that way, they key is not to get it into your head that dating the best friend doesn’t ALWAYS work out, all it takes is some keen observational skills and being able to take an objective view of the situation (as it is) rather than a subjective (how you believe it should be).

If she asks for your opinion on how to talk to a guy, tells you about guys she likes or ever says you are like her “big brother” or something along those lines (as in someone she wouldn’t date) you don’t have a chance (actually you do, but it’s probably

The World’s Best Chat-Up Lines

Sorry to disappoint, but the “World’s Best Chat Up lines” don’t actually exist. Certainly a tried and tested list doesn’t exist that works for everybody. This is because ice-breaking “chat up lines” are all very personal, and you have got to be able to carefully read the situation very carefully before you “slip one in”. This means judging her mood, the mood of the environment you’re in and making sure that she hears it! If she asks you to repeat the line because you’re in a noisy location or in a group chat where you didn’t judge the “gap” in the conversation correctly, it’s mucho embarrassment for you, plus a great liner lost!

The other consideration is that the “chat up line” has to sound natural to YOU. You could get a huge book of liners from so called experienced “chat up gurus” and they sound like they could work off the page, but if you’re saying a form of words you wouldn’t normally say, it’ll sound unnatural and simply won’t work.

So what makes a great chat up line to really break the ice with you and a new woman you fancy? Well, the best ones are where you compliment the girl, and where you can follow up with a genuine comment.

If you said for example: “What does it feel like to be the most beautiful girl in this room?” She may reply by being all bashful and not really give you a proper reply, but what then if you follow up by looking around the bar or street where you are, and actually challenge her to point out better looking women! This really can work well, and if you show you genuinely and sincerely think she is very attractive, you’ll get more “boyfriend points” and get a great confidence boost. Of course this only works if you really DO “only have eyes for her”. It’s no good if you are obviously leering at every busty blonde that walks in the club!

Be careful when choosing your “compliment” liners, as you don’t want to use really mawkish, cheesy ones. Liners like: “If you stood in front of a mirror and held up 11 roses, you would see 12 of the most beautiful things in the world.” Or “God must have been showing off when he made you”; or even: “You must be a thief, because you stole my heart from across the room.” might make the girl want to throw up.

Of course, over the top chat up lines are fine like this when said in obvious jest, and you both know each other a bit. If you are the type of person who can come over with confidence and without embarrassment, try these: “I’m new in town and can’t find my way around; er, could I have directions to your place?” Laugh, be cool and this sort of thing can work well.

Be careful you don’t “cross the line” with a girl where the chat up line assumes she is just interested in going to bed with guys, such as the time honoured “Excuse me, my bed is broken, can I use yours?”, or “Nice top. That would really match the carpet on my bedroom floor!”; and definitely not: “Do you own a poultry farm? Because I’m sure you’re great at raising cocks..” Avoid this type of chat up line at all costs unless you’re 100% sure the girl has this wicked (and male) sense of humour!

With all these points in mind, here is my selection of really tested and “sensible” chat up lines that you could try as long as they match your own personality. With all of these, you need to use them with skill. Listen to how she responds and watch for subtle body language movements that mean she could be interested. If she’s obviously intelligent and susses your words as a corny chat up line, admit it, make a joke about it, and just be cool!

“Hello. The only thing your eyes haven’t told me is your name.”

“Excuse me; do you have your phone number? I seem to have lost mine.”

“There must be something wrong with my eyes. (Wait for a response) Yes, I can’t take them off you.”

“Hello – (holding your mobile phone as if you’d just had a call) Cupid just called me. He says to tell you that he needs my heart back.”

“Do you believe in love at first sight… or should I walk by you again?”

“Is it hot in here or is it just you?”

And once you’ve had a bit of conversation and you’re ready to move to the next stage:

“You look almost perfect…the only thing I can see that’s wrong is your lips…they’re not touching mine.”

“Your lips look so lonely. Would they like to meet mine?”

Good luck in your dating!

Peter Baker – Grab A Hot Date.

Make the Most of Russian Girls Chat

When you’re online, you might find that it’s easy to waste a lot of time. But when you’re trying to find love, you need to make the most of the hours you spend on the Internet. In a Russian girls chat, there are a number of ways you can make the most of your time. As a result, you will find you will be able to meet more women and girls, while also getting to know the Russian women more easily. In the end, you will be able to find love in less time than it might have taken when you were out in the local bars.

Know the Chat Room Sites

Before you can make the most of Russian girls chat, you need to make sure you are on a site that you trust, on a site where you will actually meet a lot of women. Look into each of the sites that you have found and see if they are going to be able to help you make the most of your time online. They should have chat rooms and easy to use search options. You need to be able to find as many tools on the sites to use as possible. This will allow you to select Russian women to chat with online, while also helping you to find the best women possible online.

Talk Often in Chat Rooms

You can’t make the most of Russian girls chat rooms if you’re not actually using them. You need to make sure that you are online and using these room as often as possible. This will ensure you are making contact with as many women as possible, eventually finding the one who will become your wife. It’s a good idea to try to talk to your chosen women online or to as many women as possible online each and every day. This will ensure that you are able to speak with all of the women possible and eventually you will be able to find the one who you can begin to talk with every day, without having to talk to anyone else.

Have Questions to Answer

While this might sound a little strange, having a list of questions you want answered will help you weed out the people you don’t want to talk to when you’re in a Russian girls chat room. Have these questions sitting by you on your computer and see who answers them in a way that you like. You might find that you get a number of different responses, but there will be some that connect with you more than others. And those are the people you want to talk with more.